"The Guardian and the Washington Post have revealed that the NSA has a back door called PRISM into all our internet communications (emails, over-the-internet phone calls, browser search history, etc.) with 9 major companies, including Microsoft, Google and Yahoo! (but not, interestingly, Twitter).”
The People's Think Tank has learned from White House, DOJ, NSA, Pentagon, Homeland Security, CIA, FBI, and Department of Housing and Urban Development sources that PRISM was a diversionary tactic to keep secret a far more intrusive method of spying on the American people.
As it turns out, the so-called “metadata” collection of every keystroke on every computer and the storage of every phone call made anywhere and everywhere pales in comparison with the government's collection of what has become known as “pata data.” (This term is derived from a clandestine eccentric French underground university, Le Collège de Pataphysique, which has perfected the science of imaginary solutions.)
This super-duper, ultra-secret program is called IMPRISM. Cyber warfare scientists in underground labs in secure salt caverns in Leslieville, New Mexico using unpublished research by Nikola Tesla have perfected the ability to electronically monitor the thoughts and emotions of every person on earth over the age of 9 months. As neurologists have known for decades, every thought and emotion in the human brain activates an electronic impulse that IMPRISM can now detect.
Liberal Democratic politicians are more than thrilled that President Obama has chosen to activate this program because they believe that IMPRISM will identify every terrorist, would-be terrorist, terrorist supporter, terrorist apologist, and every other human being who has had any anti-government thought or feeling.
The Republican National Committee to Restore George W. Bush to World Stature says of IMPRISM: “President Bush stated unequivocally that the United States was attacked on 9/11 because terrorists hate our freedom. Therefore, our job is to eradicate every freedom so that finally we can be 110 percent safe. We expect nothing less from IMPRISM.”