True Confessions Feed

ALAN WALD PUTS ON THE RITZ

Ritz
Many years ago, when Pacifican  Alan Wald learned that the new Ritz-Carlton in Half Moon Bay would need to fill more than 300 new jobs, he not only applied for a job but also applied to the DMV for personalized license plates for his two cars: RITZ HMB and HMB RITZ. As it turned out, Wald didn't get the job. ("Too old," they said.) Wald muses, "I guess you could say I applied for a job at the Ritz, and all I got were these crummy license plates."


Hot Dogma

A Zen master visiting New York City goes up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen master, who pays with a $20 bill. The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it. "Excuse me, but where’s my change?" asks the Zen master. The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."